Hopes and dreams:

lajoiedevivre:

inspired by Sarah, here are the things I dream about:

  • I want a successful, fulfilling career in policy, doing something that actually helps better women’s lives.
  • I don’t want to live in the suburbs. It may be DC or New York, or a smaller city eventually, but I’d like to live in a nice neighborhood in a city.
  • I’d like a nice apartment in this city, decorated just the way I like — with a tin ceiling in the kitchen and velvet curtains in at least one room.

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Source: lajoiedevivre

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Source: softwhisper

Can’t believe I was in Nepal a year ago…
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Can’t believe I was in Nepal a year ago…

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Source: softwhisper

Did I tell you guys about the time my roommates & I built a giant fort in the living room? We were able to fit 3 (twin-sized) mattresses in there…
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Did I tell you guys about the time my roommates & I built a giant fort in the living room? We were able to fit 3 (twin-sized) mattresses in there…

Downsides to having Psychology as your major:

  • Every time you explain a cool study’s findings/results to someone, they say, “Oh, of course, that makes sense!” like it was common sense to begin with and “Well DUH.” Man. How many times do I have to hear that. Hindsight is 20/20…every side “makes sense” to some degree. And “man psychology sounds so easy, all the stuff ‘makes sense’ or ‘is logical’”
  • Assumptions that Psychology is ALL clinical (counseling, psychiatry, etc.) …no. No it’s not.
  • Assumptions that I can “explain” (what does that even mean) all behavior and all things like god damned magic. And it’s not even stuff that would make sense for me to understand…it’s like, “Oh, someone was acting rude today, tell me why that is.” 
  • Basically wrong assumptions on what psychology majors learn in general. No, god damnit, I can’t psychoanalyze you.
  • Also, not all psych majors love or believe in Freud’s theories. If anything, most people dislike them, ‘cause lots of his findings have been proven wrong.
  • If I hear one more “Psychologists say…” or “It’s a psychological fact that…” or read another bullshit psychology-related article I’m going to throw something. AHHH. Geezus. Just like in other sciences, there’s such a thing as bad science in psychology - just because an article “says” something doesn’t mean it’s true. Examine the methodology, question the logic, look up sources.

I’m grumpy today.

I’ll be honest,

I kind of just wanted to see a jazz thing tonight because I wanted to see that cute piano player. I mean, I wouldn’t have minded seeing another show, but cute guys on the piano…c’mon, that’s just icing on the cake.

late night confessions

  • when i’m in a sad mood i make myself even more sad so i can cry and let it all out. this usually means repeating sad songs or watching The Time Traveler’s Wife. shut up. Rachel McAdams in a wedding dress and the ending and SOOOOB.
  • i had a bacon cheeseburger, fries and a chocolate lava cake for dinner. i’m basically in the fetal position and filled with regret right now. WHY. my stomach is so unhappy with me
  • i just watched like 3 episodes of “Say Yes to the Dress” and i’m feeling pretty full of self-hate/regret/shame right now. i dislike 90% of the dresses on the show but it’s still my guilty pleasure.
  • i hate when i go to sleep thinking of someone/something i don’t want to be thinking of, and wake up with the same thought. i hate it.
  • for the last month i’ve been waking up 1-2 hours before my alarm goes off because i’m paranoid i’ll sleep through it (i think this phone only allows one alarm?? blackberry anyone?) IT IS ANNOYING and i curse, squint in the sunlight, check the time and then go back to sleep.
  • i really feel like drinking and sitting under the stars. 
  • i hope i have one of those really crazy, incredibly happy, perfect-moment type of dreams. waking up is heartbreaking but i need it, i think.
  • i’m thinking about doing some writing kind’ve…travel writing themed. may post them on this tumblr later for feedback.
  • i’m a huge introvert. i always feel like i’m faking anything remotely extroverted or friendly.
  • why the fuck am i posting this
  • oh who gives a fuck its myyyy blooooog
  • i really want to give blood again but I can’t until june because i went to nepal. i think it’s the only real good thing i’ve done since high school. donating blood that is. ugh.
  • i used to be a good person. honest.
  • I’ve been replayingHow We Loveby Ingrid Michaelson for the last couple days. i think i identify with some of it.
  • my ideal life: living on an italian villa with friends, driving a really badass bmw, being insanely rich and buying awesome clothes/shoes, having 3 labradors, paint like a boss, play the piano like a boss, know what the fuck i’m doing when drinking wine/beer, have beautiful home, speak french fluently,  join the x-men and save the world.
  • the end

Beginners (2011)

  • Hal: Well, let's say that since you were little, you always dreamed of getting a lion. And you wait, and you wait, and you wait, and you wait but the lion doesn't come. And along comes a giraffe. You can be alone, or you can be with the giraffe.
  • Oliver: I'd wait for the lion.
  • Hal: That's why I worry about you.

Source: 52hearts

life is a dumb series of ups and downs.

one day you feel good about everything and life is perfect and adventure and energy

and then the next it seems really shitty and lonely and pathetic

but nothing has changed in the last two days

so really, what i mean is, i’m a fucking crazy person.

stupid emotions.

also, i’m a stupid, stupid masochistic girl.

—

Most friends have expiration dates. You can see their eventual finish, whether it be natural or purposeful. I have to admit that several of my friends are just friends that I can get use out of. Some company, someone to talk to, some laughs. Sure, we get along alright, but I don’t appreciate or really respect them as people. There are fundamental flaws, big, obvious bad qualities. Those friends have expiration dates. After that class ends, after college ends, maybe some months down the line when we “drift apart.”

And some friends don’t have expiration dates. Or, at least, the expiration date isn’t as clear. I like those friends. They have good hearts and are good people; you can’t just have good intentions.

We built an epic fort this weekend.

And I had the most amazing dream in it. I woke up with that terrible fleeting moment of joy and warmth and then realized that today was Sunday and there was school tomorrow and no, none of that dream was real. I don’t want to leave the fort. It’s warm and it loves me.

Things I have to do, and what I’d rather be doing:

Things I have to do:

  • Read for my Psych of Gender class.
  • Study for my Forensic Psych class.
  • Read for my Attitudes & Attitude Changes class.
  • Write two assignments for my Seminar in Psych.
  • Do stuff for my club, email people, plan events, blahblahblah.

Things I would rather be doing:

  • Drinking coffee at a cafe with friends
  • Watching the shit out of How I Met Your Mother (yay Netflix!)
  • Reading all the books I’m behind on
  • Guzzling a margherita margerita (I’m obviously thinking of pizza).
  • Sleeping
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Source: postsecret.com

kind of drunk

sobsob ALONE 4EVER SOB insert whiney single crap sob sob.

Also there’s a zombie themed night at the california academy of science in SF and I wanna go because there will be BRAIN SPECIMENS and I don’t even care about zombies but i wanna get zombie make up there and ZOOOMGGG why aren’t my roommates as enthusastic as i am about this.